Healing After Abuse

by Sisterlisa

Many times I have known women who have been battered by their husbands, beaten in schools by bullies, verbal abused by 'friends', and outcast by cliques. If you are a lady who has experienced all of those in your life time you are not alone and may God bless your soul with His infinite grace and mercy as you seek Him for healing. Although not all of us have experienced all of these types of abuse, but perhaps we have suffered at the hands of a few abusers in our life time. The pain is still there and we need healing.

I'm not going to explain all the facts about the cycle of abuse an abuser goes through or really the cycle the victim goes through. Although, I do feel that education is key in escaping that cycle and breaking it once and for all so you never return to it again. What I aim to do today is simply direct you to Jesus Christ. He loves you more than you can ever imagine. He knows your pain and He was with you when it happened. He knows every intricate detail of the amount of physical pain, emotional shame, spiritual upheaval, and social consequences to what you have experienced.

I have experienced a few of these types of abuse in my life and sometimes I just don't want to think about it. Many times I have pushed those memories to the back of my mind, the darkest place of my being, so that I don't have to relive every painful moment of my past. Yet time and time again, some how some way that pain is brought forth to the front of my mind and heart, desperately seeking to be brought to light. Why must I keep seeing those horrible images of memories be brought out again and again? Why can't I just hide them forever and not remember them ever again? I want it to stay in the deepest, darkest parts of my memories so I don't have to see it! There's something about this resurfacing of pain. It must be brought to the light, the Light named Jesus Christ.

Yes, he knows our every pain and he is already well aware of what has happened to us, but have we actually handed it over to Him so He can do what He wants with it? When we plant a seed of pain and anguish in the deepest, darkest parts of our being, it begins to germinate and take root. This is the process of bitterness. Bitterness breeds hate and hate grips our minds and souls with its talons and rips us apart from the inside. If we allow bitterness to take root then how can Christ work through us to extend grace to those who need to see Him?

I feel that sometimes we don't think we are bitter, but when triggers appear and our first reaction is anger or we experience pain again then we most surely have allowed that seed to germinate. That root system must be brought to the Light so He can do His work on us. His Light is a dividing light that will shine so bright that it burns up that root system and seed so that it will no longer exist. The memories will always be with us, but the pain they cause will cease. When He brings it out, he will not use it against us, to hurt us, belittle us, or condemn us.

He wants to show us what he does with that bitterness and pain. He wants to show us how he covers it with His own blood, so that we can look at it through His eyes and see the beauty he brings to all things. All things for His good pleasure. To show us how much he loves us and how his mercy and grace can reach down to the deepest, darkest parts of our being, and gently lift the root system out. He then will place his gentle, healing hand over our fresh wound and anoint us with His healing power. He wants to embrace us and have us embrace him back.

I won't tell you that it won't be without tears and pain, it just may hurt at first, but only if we look at the root system with hatred and disgust. If we indeed look at this process with those eyes then we are no better than the one who hurt us. We must submit to the power of Christ and allow Him to show us how to look through the eyes of grace. I can only say these words to you because I know how this feels. Last night God showed me how to look at one of my past abusers through His eyes of grace. As he showed me this abuser I began to pray for this man. I prayed for him and the family he now has. The more I pray for him the more my heart heals. The more my heart heals, the more grace I can see. The more grace I can see, the clearer my vision of Christ becomes and that is the ultimate goal. To see Christ in all His glory, as much as we can possibly see with our human eyes and he sure wants us to see Him up close and personal.

Dear Believer, Jesus Christ can heal your broken heart. You can trust Him. I don't know if you'll ever trust the abuser again or any person who holds a similar position, but I know you can trust Jesus Christ. He is the same yesterday, today, and forever. Let him embrace you and embrace him right back. No quick hugs, let this embrace last you a lifetime. Don't ever let go.

Song of Solomon 2:6, "His left hand is under my head, and his right hand doth embrace me."